Understanding Self-Worth Through Vedic Wisdom
Someone tells you that you did a wonderful job. Instead of saying thank you, you immediately explain why it was not that difficult.
A colleague praises your work, and you give everyone else the credit. A friend appreciates something you did, and you brush it aside with a joke.
You may not even realise you are doing it.
Why do compliments make you uncomfortable, even when they are sincere?
Sometimes, the difficulty is not hearing something positive. It is allowing yourself to believe it without feeling embarrassed, undeserving or exposed.
Why Is It Hard to Accept a Compliment?
There is no single explanation.
You may have learned to minimise your achievements. You may focus on every mistake rather than the overall result. You may worry that acknowledging your strengths will make you appear arrogant. Or you may simply dislike being the centre of attention.
Psychological research offers one possible explanation. A 2017 study published in the Journal of Experimental Social Psychology found that people with lower self-esteem had more difficulty accepting positive feedback from close others when that feedback conflicted with their existing negative beliefs about themselves. The difficulty was reduced when they focused on the specific compliment rather than interpreting it through their broader self-image.
This does not mean everyone who struggles to accept praise has low self-esteem. It suggests that how you see yourself can influence how you interpret what others say about you.
Does Accepting Praise Make You Arrogant?
No. Recognising a genuine strength is not the same as believing you are superior to others.
Compare these two responses:
“It was nothing. Anyone could have done it.”
“Thank you. I worked hard on it, and I am glad it helped.”
The second response acknowledges your contribution without exaggerating it.
Humility does not require you to deny your abilities. You can recognise what you did well and still have things to learn.
What Does the Bhagavad Gita Teach About Humility?
In Bhagavad Gita 13.7–8, depending on the edition's verse numbering, Krishna includes amanitvam (humility) and adambhitvam (freedom from pretence or ostentation) among qualities associated with knowledge.
A practical interpretation is that humility is not about pretending you have no strengths. It is about recognising yourself honestly without exaggeration or the need to appear superior.
The concept of svadhyaya, commonly associated with self-study and reflective inquiry, offers another useful lens: examine your reaction rather than treating it as an unchangeable part of your personality.
When someone compliments you, ask yourself:
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Do I genuinely disagree with the compliment, or am I uncomfortable being recognised?
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Would I dismiss the same achievement if someone else had done it?
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Can I acknowledge my contribution without comparing myself with anyone else?
Why Should You Learn to Receive Appreciation?
Compliments are not merely statements about achievement. They can also be ways people communicate appreciation and positive regard.
A 2021 series of experiments by Zhao and Epley found that people often underestimated the positive impact their compliments would have on recipients, which could make them less willing to express genuine appreciation.
More recently, a 2026 study involving four preregistered studies and 2,056 adults found that deflecting compliments, compared with accepting them, was associated with less favourable perceptions of warmth, competence and likability. This research examined social perceptions; it does not mean every compliment should be accepted uncritically.
You do not need to seek constant praise. But repeatedly dismissing sincere appreciation may make it harder for others to communicate what they value about you.
How Can You Become More Comfortable Accepting Compliments?
1. Pause before dismissing the compliment. Notice the urge to explain, joke or disagree. You do not have to act on it immediately.
2. Say thank you. “Thank you, I appreciate that” is enough. You do not need to prove that the person is right or explain why they might be wrong.
3. Separate appreciation from perfection. Someone can value your contribution even if the result was not flawless.
4. Consider the evidence. If someone praises your reliability, creativity or patience, reflect on what they may have observed.
5. Acknowledge one thing you did well. At the end of the day, identify one specific action you handled well. This is not about pretending to be perfect; it is about evaluating yourself fairly.
Can Vedic Astrology Explain Your Discomfort With Recognition?
Vedic astrology offers a traditional framework for reflecting on self-expression, relationships and recognition. Depending on the question, an astrologer may consider the Sun, Venus, the 1st and 10th houses, planetary relationships and the current Mahadasha and Antardasha.
However, no single planetary placement can establish why you feel uncomfortable receiving compliments. Your experiences, personal beliefs and circumstances matter too.
Astrology is best used here as a framework for reflection, not a definitive psychological explanation.
AskVedicaa: Understand Your Response, Not Just Your Horoscope
The more useful question may be:
“What makes it difficult for me to recognise my own contribution?”
With AskVedicaa, you can explore personal questions through a Vedic framework and ask follow-up questions connected to your circumstances.
You can examine questions about self-expression, recognition and your current life phase without being assigned a fixed label.
You do not have to become someone who enjoys being the centre of attention.
You can remain humble and grounded while learning to accept sincere appreciation.
Explore your question with AskVedicaa
FAQs
Why do I reject compliments even when I appreciate them?
You may feel uncomfortable with attention, struggle to recognise your strengths or believe that acknowledging praise makes you appear arrogant. Notice the specific thought that arises when someone appreciates you.
Is it wrong to feel proud of my achievements?
No. Recognising effort and achievement is different from believing you are superior to others. Humility and self-respect can coexist.
How should I respond when someone compliments me?
A sincere “Thank you, I appreciate that” is enough. You do not have to minimise the achievement or return a compliment immediately.
What does the Bhagavad Gita say about humility?
Bhagavad Gita 13.7–8, depending on the edition's numbering, includes humility and freedom from pretence among qualities associated with knowledge. A practical interpretation is to recognise your abilities honestly without exaggerating or denying them.
Can Vedic astrology explain my discomfort with recognition?
Vedic astrology can offer a traditional framework for reflecting on identity, self-expression and recognition. It cannot independently diagnose the reason for your discomfort.
More Interesting Reads
Personal boundaries: Why Do I Feel Guilty When I Choose Myself?
Purpose and identity: Why Do I Feel Lost in Life?
Emotional wellbeing: Why Does Life Feel Empty Even When Everything Is Going Well?
Career and recognition: Should I Change My Job?
Contributed by Mandeep Vats
RESEARCH AND SCRIPTURE REFERENCES
1. Bhagavad Gita 13.7–8 — humility (amanitvam) and freedom from pretence (adambhitvam), among qualities associated with knowledge. Verse numbering varies by edition.
2. Kille, D. R., Eibach, R. P., Wood, J. V., & Holmes, J. G. (2017). “Who can't take a compliment? The role of construal level and self-esteem in accepting positive feedback from close others.” Journal of Experimental Social Psychology, 68, 40–49. DOI: 10.1016/j.jesp.2016.05.003.
3. Zhao, X., & Epley, N. (2021). “Insufficiently complimentary? Underestimating the positive impact of compliments creates a barrier to expressing them.” Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 121(2), 239–256. DOI: 10.1037/pspa0000277.
4. Prinsloo, E., & Moon, A. (2026). “To Accept or Deflect Praise? Examining the Social Consequences of Compliment Responses.” Academy of Management Proceedings. DOI: 10.5465/AMPROC.2026.427bp. Four preregistered studies, N = 2,056.